My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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