I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
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