There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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