I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize