am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
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Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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