On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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