Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Is it because I queefed?
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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