So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize