I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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