i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
