Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
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