I'm so fucking centered right now
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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