She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
