My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
