is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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