No awkward lesbian experiences without me
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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