just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
