I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
i came on her dog
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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