Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
