so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
don't judge my taste in strippers
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize