yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You are a genius and a whore.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
