But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
