I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Randomize
