At least make sure they are 18
Why
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
