I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize