Where is the hickey?
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
