hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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