Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
