"it" just moved
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
