it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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