Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
