THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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