Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
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Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
false alarm, still single
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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