Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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