jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize