Do you still have your period?
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Randomize