All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize