the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
The feeling are messing with the penis
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
