Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
worst night to have a conscience
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so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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