I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
