i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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