you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
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it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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