That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
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