How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
