So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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