Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize