i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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