i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
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