Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
