I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I would fuck him just for his dog
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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