i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
